What he expressed was wonderful, but was also unfortunately
odd to me as it seems a majority of teenage kids aren’t that interested in
spending time with their parents (and visa versa). While most might “love each other”, I suspect
a combination of different schedules, agendas and interests lead them to indifference
and ultimately some level of rebellion as the kid &/or parent are more
interested in doing their own thing than working to nurture relationship.
My friend also mentioned that as parents they intentionally
reinforced a simple Gospel message to his kids; “that God loves us and wants us
to be happy.” He went on to say that we
Christians (and churches and parents) are quick to complicate the Gospel with
all kinds of rules that turn people off and drive them away. The Gospel means “good news” that should
bring true joy and freedom, but it is too often reinforced as layers of do’s
and don’ts that bring judgment and guilt.
I know the first part of my friend’s simple Gospel statement
to be true, but I’ve struggled a bit with the second. Does God want me to be happy? I would agree that he wants what’s best for
me and also that I be joyful, but happy?
I suppose I might be nitpicking semantics a bit, but have ultimately reconciled
the statement by thinking about my own kids.
I certainly want them to be happy, but I don’t always support their own
expressed convictions about what they think they want or need to be happy. I want the best for them and at times will
let them be “unhappy” about something for both their own good and the good of
those they will interact with in the future.
No one likes a narcissistic brat, no matter what age.
My friends comments are challenging to me as a father and as an
adopted son of God. How simple is the Gospel and what do I believe? How do I
parent? Riker starts high
school in a few months and I know those years will pass quickly. Does he know of my love and desire for more
time and depth of relationship? Does he
know I want the very best for him? Does
he know that he has freedom to make good choices and that I want him to reap
the benefits from the good rather than the difficult consequences of the bad? Does he know I’ll always love and forgive him
no matter what? Does he know the extents
that I’ll go for him – both to bless him and when needed discipline him for his
own good? Does he know the same of his Heavenly Father? Do I? If we really knew and believed
it, what all would be different?
The truth is that I know, but that I'm quick to forget and need reminders. I got another today as Taya and I helped in Tirza’s Sunday School
class. The story was of Jesus
having dinner with Mary and Martha and how Martha missed the opportunity for relationship because
she was busy and distracted (Luke 10:38-42). The message
for the kids was “Jesus wants to be your friend” – another good reminder and candidate for a good
and simple statement of the Gospel.
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